Mother nature has a very brutal way of letting us know we are woman every month. A few days ago I was sitting in my writing class feeling unusually exhausted. I felt dizzy, tired, and weak. The idea came to me that I could have mono. I spent the next two days frantically googling about the symptoms involved with mono. Eventually I realized I was just a severe dumb ass, and it was only my period. I guess it just left my mind what a period was like, this month. Any who, this strange occurrence made me really realize how brutal a period really is. Most people.. cough cough!.. men!, don’t understand how physically paralyzing it really is to menstruate every month. Most woman become physically sick. I personally think its a curse, but others have their opinions too. (They don’t matter though;) ) I guess my point here is just, periods arnt even necessary. They ruin your entire week, make you bloated, a pizza face, and a complete bitch.
Why do I feel the way I don’t? Why are people constantly unfulfilled by life. it seems like the human race, including myself; are always missing something. Things like relationships, money, overall happiness, and success. I gain some rope, and I want even more. But when I get more I end up hanging myself. And what I’ve wanted for so long, is actually what I never wanted at all. So why is it that things are always missing? We live are whole lives waiting to achieve. So when is that moment when we decided we’ve got it all? I’ve always imagined that moment like this: Me at eighty years old, sitting on the front porch on a sunny day, while reading a book. My husband and I sitting side by side, rocking in our chairs. Sipping tea and smelling the fresh country air. Watching my beautiful grandchildren play in the yard. Suddenly I realize, I’ve accomplished everything I ever wanted. A wonderful husband, beautiful successful children and grandchildren, and most importantly beautiful memories. I’ll sit rocking, gazing, and remembering that time when we visited the rocky mountains as a family, that time I first fell in love with the boy from my home town, or how my mother used to make the best mashed potatos. So will my moment of realization really happen this way? What happens if I die young? what am I living for then? I guess the point of life is to desire an accomplishment; a goal. And then one day you will be able to feel the way you don’t now…absolute euphoric happiness.
People, lets move away from the idea that everyone should look, act, and think a certain way. Just say at the top of your lungs “I’m a dork!” or ” I’m weird!” or ” I’m secretly in love with Mileys music” (Even though its not considered socially acceptable) .. I stopped caring what others like and don’t like about me and just stick to what makes me happy, as weird as it may be. For example, in my psychology lecture my professor mentioned something about how we can actually trick our brain into being happy, just by smiling. So what do I do with the helpful information? Ok, I’ll tell you, calm down. A few days later as im driving home, I start to feel sad:(…and then I remembered! I whipped out that grin like nobody’s business. oddly enough, it was at a red light next to a man in his truck. We made the most awkward eye contact, and he looked a bit scared by my huge grin. That didn’t stop me though! He probably thought I was psychotic, but oh well. At least I was happy! Who needs therapy? Try it some time;)
ladies and gentleman, I now introduce to you… my first official post! hmmm… what to say? Lets start with my blog name. Interesting eh? Jordangerous? that’s right, its completely original. Mixing Jordan and dangerous into one awesome word. Some annoying kid I used to work with at Outback used to call me this wonderful name, and while forming my blog it just seemed to be perfect, almost like fait;) At least Mr. Annoying-Pants was good for something.